Feeling a bit like I can't breathe again today, and have this voice playing over and over in my head every time I start to freak out. be still and know that i am god.

trying, I am, though it's hard. things feel like they're about to come crashing down around my ears.

i should be party planning for the boy who turns 6 tomorrow, but there's not a smidgen of budget for that. he did get a great present today, courtesy of a gift card his dad had squirreled away from his own birthday. Perhaps i will regret getting a power tool for a 6-year-old?! His dad's suggestion of course. A toolbox full of his own tools, wood glue, etc, and a cordless drill with a full bit set. It's the smallest they have (7.5 volts) but you can still do plenty of damage with that to just about anything. When i repeated a friend's concern to M about what he could do to his little brother with it, he replied that he doubted he could drill through bone, F had a tough skull. thanks for the flippant reassurance.

will i ever be done nagging and correcting homework? changing poopy diapers? freaking about bouncing checks?

be still.

(ok, I'll try)

no, really ... be still. and know. that I. am God.